World News Beat

USA – US-Mexico border wall to be built and higher security in the US refugee program to be implemented President Donald Trump’s early campaign promise to build a wall along the United States-Mexico border has been placed in an order and signed to follow through with the plan. Trump has also devised a plan to […]

Reasons you’re voting for Clinton/Trump

Headline: Why you’re voting for DRUMPF 1. It’s time that politics get honest! So let’s have the wealthy elite run things openly. 2. You’re not sure why all these people are here chanting “Trump,” but you enjoy loud noises. Like guns — they excite you. 3. You’re tired of politicians’ tricks, like facts and reason. […]

Safe policing starts without handguns

We hear about police brutality far too often these days. It seems like every day I read about another innocent civilian shot; often an unarmed black man who was complying with police orders. One of the best ways to prevent these situations would be to strip police officers of their service handguns, at least for […]

Expectations versus reality: Promises for next semester

What you say: “I’ll start my essays way before they’re even due!” What you’ll actually do: Sit around playing League of Legends and watching videos of cats jumping on pianos. Shit, you’ll even watch paint dry, anything to avoid that essay!   What you say: “I’ll actually read the syllabus next semester!” What you’ll actually […]

Desperate student attempts blood ritual to garner passing grade

As if fears of residence closure and hiking tuition costs on campus weren’t bad enough, residences on Burnaby campus are now facing a scare of a different kind: the occult. Last week, police were called to respond to what initially seemed to be a run-of-the-mill noise complaint. However, they made a startling discovery when they […]

Why Canada isn’t all that bad

Ahh, Canada, that patch of snowy desolation that inspired such a lack of interest from the French they simply told Britain, “Fuck, just take it.” Canada has done a lot of growing since the 19th century.  While it still isn’t exactly the most glamorous place to live, Canada Day celebrations are more exciting than just […]

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